Out with the old, in with the new

You see I am a creature of habit. Yes I would love to say I am an evolving creature who is open to change. The truth of the matter is I hate change ohh how I hate change.

So thinking about change I decided after my last heart break, i would just do the dating thing before falling head over heels( yes I have had a major one that made me contemplate if life was worth living. That's a story for another day when I am in the right emotional place to give a detailed honest account). You see when I love I tend to truly fall in love...

Anyway I met my next interest. Decided to actually date and I mean sex was of the table for a while. I wanted to be wined and dined, doors being opened etc. So we agreed to bare all and start seeing each other. Mr last interest did do some of dating things as for commitment well............You see prior to this last encounter I have/had clear deal breakers and in as much as he was all up for them at the start of the encounter he found some of then harder to deal with.

Why is life always complicated? I tried this dating thing. I HONESTLY DO NOT KNOW. I am now questioning myself. Obviously the old me did not work out and now the new one well, its not working out very well.

Out with the old, in with the new. Do I even know where I am going, heading, what's there and how do I get there?? Do I even want to see what the new looks like? Will I like it?

Have you ever tried the new way, and how did it work out? I think I am too scared, maybe too damaged to even consider change being a beautiful thing.

For now ........

Carpe diem

lyfeofDelaz